The Breakup

I used to miss his laugh, his smile, his catch phrases that i had secretly stolen and used on my friends haha. I still do! But finally after 6 months, I have come to terms with my breakup. Yes, update we broke up. I went through being depressed to being angry to finally accepting. In the process i have found out my true friends and gotten closer to my family and finally im in a good place. I tried to get through to him after so long because, well i miss him. I could tell him my problems the jokes i heard the memes i have seen, he understood me. The bond we had was strong but now i have to move on i guess. I do appreciate one gift he gave me though, im now much closer to God and… Im celibate! Haha There is power in being in control of my own body. My silence has ended… Im back!



My Princess

princessThey say when a boy is naughty,

The world punishes him with girls.

His entire life is evolved around

Protecting his daughter from the very boys

He once used to be.

But when I look at you I don’t see a punishment

I see a blessing.

My princess, I would give my life for you.

Every day I remind you that you can become anything in this world

I give you all that you need so you won’t ask any man for anything.

If that boy buys you a necklace in hopes to get into your pants

I will buy a diamond one with your name on it so you will give it back.

You are a precious jewel

I will shield you enough to keep you safe but independent at the same time.

Baby girl, you are the most beautiful girl in the world.

You are intelligent, you can now count from 1-10

Even when I’m mad at you I will never lay my hands on you

Not because I want to spoil you but because I don’t want you to think it is okay

That a man can beat you up.

I can see the wonder in your eyes, the way they brighten up

When you see something new.

I am forever your first knight in shining armor

And you are forever my Princess.

Swimmer Syndrome in Puppies?

I know I know… It has been ages since I even had a look at wordpress though I have a good excuse 🙂 hehe. Have any of you ever heard of swimmer syndrome in puppies? I honestly have never!! My dog recently had a litter of 9 and I thought everything was going perfectly and smoothly however, a month down the line, the runt of the litter still could not walk. You would hear him crying all night trying to move 1 foot in order to feed. I literally had a baby of my own! Waking up 5-10 times in the night to help this poor pup! I put it down to he’s the runt! He is weak, frail and just needs a little push.

A week later, I noticed that he was dragging himself across the ground. Legs spread out on either side like this:


It looks painful right? You see!! I told you I had an excuse. The vet advised me to put him down but I just couldn’t bring myself to. So i did what any normal person would do in the 21st century… I googled. Now my little runt is running around like nothing happened almost as big as the rest!!! Please, if you have a puppy that is a “swimmer” just google. There are simple steps to help your puppy out!!

A letter to my 16 year old self


When he puts his hand on your leg or on the small of the back you will feel butterflies! Your heart will feel like it is about to burst. But that is all it is… a feeling! Wait. Wait for that feeling to pass. Block out the sound of his voice saying he loves you. When its gone look at him. You can now notice the smell of his B.O. You can now see what you once called a “moustach” as just a few stubbles of hair. You can now notice the crusted mucas fused with his notril hair. His once sparkling hazel eyes are now just a dull brown. He is saying “I love you” but you can hear the irritation in his voice. You was about to make a mistake! When u feel his sweat dripping on you. When you feel his flabby stomach touching yours. When you hear his heavy breathing. You would be disgusted. For that feeling would have faded away. Be patient. Your true love is on his way. He is just practicing being a better man for you. And for goodness sake! Red hair is not sexy!!

Yours truly,
Your Guardian Angel

Mystery Blogger Award :)

Mystery Blogger Award is an award for amazing bloggers with ingenious posts. Their blog not only captivates; it inspires and motivates. They are one of the best out there, and they deserve every recognition they get. This award is also for bloggers who find fun and inspiration in blogging;  and they do it with so much love and passion.

– Okoto Enigma

Rules: (Weird ones, really)

1. List the rules.

2. Put the award logo/image in your blog.

3. Thank whoever nominated you and provide a link to their blog.

4. Mention the creator of the award and provide a link as well.

5. Tell your readers three things about yourself.

6. Nominate 10-20 people.

7. Notify your nominees.

8. Ask your nominees any five questions of your choice with one weird or funny question (specify)

9. Share a link to your best posts

I will be following MOST of the rules. You know me. I am not one for following orders after all.

I was nominated for this award by elenaflutterfly. Thank you! I am so honored that after just over 2 weeks you are considering my  blog! I am truly grateful! Thank you to all the people who follow me and engage in my posts, you inspire me to keep telling my story. Special shout out to  Okoto Enigma who created this award; along with other great opportunities she creates for new and inspiring blogger through her posts.

Here are 3 things about me:

1. I am petrified of cats hehe.

2. I suck at doing makeup.

3. I am a fitness addict and love healthy living.

Now here are my answers to the questions elenaflutterfly asked me 🙂

1. If you had 3 wishes,  what would they be?

  1. I would wish to have a mind that absorbs information like a sponge hehe
  2. I would wish to win the lottery 😀
  3. I would wish to be closer in God so that i can also prosper in my after life.


2. What’s your way of De-stressing? I love to go for days at the spa. There’s something about a sauna and massage that releases all my stress.

3. If you could have one superpower,  what would it be? I think it would the ability to manipulate time haha. I think that is a cool superpower!!

4. What’s your morning routine? It is pretty simple! Wake up, take the dog outside… make sure he does his number 2 before i leave him in the garden to play. Start cooking his breakfast. Head to the shower (sing a lot in the shower hehe) and brush my teeth. DRESS UP! Do my hair and a tad bit of makeup (Lipstick and mascara only). Cook my breakfast feed the dog and i am out!! Eat on my way to work

5. Which was the funniest moment in your life till now? It must be the time i was at a neyo concert and his drone caught me singing with… lets just say, a lot of passion in my face hahaha. It was so hilarious 😀

Here are my nominees :


write handed poetry

domestic abuse survivor and friend

A thousand bits of paper


A Opinionated man

Goal Digging Chick




Here are my questions for you:

1.  If you could only save one thing while your house was on fire what would it be?

2. What is your favorite body part?

3. What is your biggest turn off in a girlfriend / wife / boyfriend / Husband?

4. If you could go to one place in this world where would you go?

5. Which clip from your childhood would you never want your parents to play at your wedding? (Yes… please describe it we would LOVE to know!)


My best posts are the only ones i have  so far :

the encounter

dark soul

If mirrors could talk

Things you should know about celibacy

What is a relationship?


Good luck 🙂





The Encounter

It was Friday night and what better way to spend it than go out right? We were in the club… a few drinks in and the music was perfect. I was so tired of constantly watching my man and not touching, with a little liquid courage, i went for it. I pulled him off the seat he had been warming the whole night to dance with me. He leaned in grabbed my neck and pulled me in for that kiss i had been longing for. It felt like a dream! Me on my tip toes and him slowly moving his hand through me hair till he whispered “lets go home”. All the way home i was wondering… could it be? Were we just about to mess up? Will i finally feel him? As soon as we entered i ripped his clothes off. Shoes, shirt, trousers, vest, why does he have so much clothes on? Boxers… ooops no i cant touch those! I literally dragged him to the bed. Every time my hand would venture near that area i felt a light but firm slap. He kissed my neck and my tummy. Why was he teasing me? 😦 dressed in my bra and knickers he could tell i was getting frustrated. I could feel his bulge up against my leg and i couldn’t take it!i grabbed his hand and tried to put it down my bra. Immediately, he sat upright. In his drunken state he told me “I think that is enough for tonight. I am going to sleep on the sofa”. He staggered to the door as i pleaded “Nooo just sleep here we don’t have to do anything!” But he replied “I don’t trust myself”. How is it that a guy has more self control than me? That night i had the BEST wet dream ever!! Yepp… a girl had a wet dream! I was woken up by a kiss on my cheek as my boyfriend whispered “we will be okay” and gave me breakfast in bed! Eggs, bread and juice. Well, he tried haha. I felt so stupid! Why had i been so pushy? Why couldn’t i just kiss him and leave it like that? Why am i turned on so much by something i can not have?

Things you should know about celibacy

I have been seeing so many books and shows about celibacy but it is not all a bed of roses! Let me show you the honest truth:

  • It does not last just 3-6 months like the celebrities show!! Mine in particular will last 5+ years.
  • You are moody… ALL THE TIME!
  • You need…NEED a hobby. A way to release stress and occupy your time.
  • Most dates are in public places such as going for a movie, to the park or for dinner
  • Ohh and about the movies, you have to read the synopsis! I mean, we don’t want any awkward moments now do we?
  • Sleep overs are the hardest thing! Especially in the mornings with the morning glory and all! Haha very tempting.
  • Every word, fruit or situation is made sexual I mean… BANANA
  • You feel no obligation to shave (Nothing is reaching there anyways)
  • It is EXPENSIVE! Like I said before, every birthday, every Christmas, every Valentine’s Day, every argument requires a real present. You can’t just get naked and everything will be fine


Dark Soul

Nothing this beautiful could be this wrong

He could get lost in her eyes for hours, she was PERFECT

But poison ran through her veins

She was a dark soul

Engulfing his innocence

Dragging him further into the depths of her deception

He was slowly becoming exactly what she wanted him to be

Lustful, Sinful, Fearless

Little did he know there was a higher power,

Watching him being drowned by this dark soul!

If Mirrors Could Talk


You are Special!

Each and every hair, laughter line, beauty spot

Is placed perfectly to make you you

Where you see stretch marks

I see a woman who pushed aside her body goals

To love a baby immensely

That chipped nail polish is okay,

Portraits with imperfections are usually the most highly valued!

But more importantly,

You have an inner beauty that outshines even the most gorgeous of women.

For physical beauty fades,

Yours is eternal.

You do not need the makeup,

Your skin is radiant with a glow of life.

Stop staring at your reflection!

You are perfect!

What is a relationship?

What is the first thing you think about when considering a relationship:

  1. Money
  2. Sex
  3. Friendship
  4. Career
  5. Whether your pet cat likes him??

Well… in the beginning it was sex for me! I mean, I have to know if we are compatible I don’t want to have to fake an orgasm every time he tries to do his business and lays on top of me one minute later….. Eish! I mean, sex to me was how to end an argument, the perfect present when you forget a birthday and even how to occupy those boring rainy days! Sex is the PERFECT TOOL. Boy was I in for a shock!

It started off with a glance in his direction then we exchanged a few texts and before I knew it, I had met the love of my life. Sounds like smooth sailing yeah? Nope! He hit me with the “no sex before marriage”. Wait? What? Hold on, did I hear correctly? I actually burst into tears and I remember thinking “Is there something wrong with me?” A guy wanted to be with me… just me! Spending time with me loving who I am and all I could worry about is if it was because I was not attractive! I wasn’t interesting! I wasn’t fun to be around! I told the same stories and the same jokes. There was nothing new… well so I thought. My tool had been successfully confiscated. HELP!

I can’t lie that this lifestyle was my choice. HELL NO! But I can’t help but think it was fate. I had recently broken up with my ex who had cheated on me with multiple women.  I mean… they were all shades and sizes as long as you were a woman he was interested. This journey I was beginning will help me gain back my confidence k now that I actually was interesting and bubbly. I was a catch! And so it begins. This is my story.